I know I need to still blog about my 16 week appointment but before I do that, I wanted to jot down some of my thoughts. I've said it before but this little blog is my journal space and I want to make sure I remember all the little things and feelings throughout this journey. I have been writing little letters to baby Schmidt about once a week and maybe one day I'll share those; it just hasn't seemed like the right time yet and they really mean a lot to me even though most of the time they are short and just a few little lines here and there.
Pregnancy has been such an emotional journey ( so typical I know, those darn hormones). There are days I love being pregnant and there are those days where I'm so over feeling nauseous and having my back hurt. But I wouldn't trade one hard day for the opportunity I'm getting. I was telling Brad the other day that it was so bittersweet to me that soon I will be halfway done with this pregnancy. He looked at me all confused because he just wants our baby to be here already so he can love and snuggle it. So let me explain. I longed for the day I would get to be pregnant and I was beginning to think I might not ever get that chance. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I cried over the fact of seeing another one of my friends announce they were pregnant. Here I am pregnant and sad about the fact that it's almost halfway over. I do not think I am the typical pregnant woman but I have loved seeing my belly expand as our baby grows bigger each week. It's amazing what our bodies are capable of. I've so enjoyed feeling those little nudges and it makes me sad that in a little over 20 weeks I won't be feeling those anymore. Don't get me wrong, I'm so excited to have this baby in my arms but there is something so special about it just being baby and I. Today I was scrolling Instagram and I was in tears seeing all these pictures of babies and just thinking how lucky I am that I'm a little over 20 weeks that will be me posting about the arrival of this little one we have hoped and prayed so hard for. I am overwhelmed with that feeling.
This baby has already brought so much more love (and worry) into our home. It makes my day when Brad randomly makes comments like "hey I see our baby" as my stomach is poking out a little more each week. Or gives me an extra kiss "for the baby". Brad has recently started studying in the baby's room and it just warms my heart. We don't even have any baby furniture set up in there just a stroller in one of the corners and it just puts the biggest smile on my face when I pass by and I see him eyeing it or pushing it around the room just "to make sure the tires are staying full of air". I can't wait to see Brad take on the role of daddy just because I know he is going to be so incredible at it. On the worry side I thought I had until the baby's arrival before that came but my goodness after this past Thursday and Friday I feel like I got a little glimpse of all the worry that parents experience for their children. It's exhausting both emotionally and physically.
Anyways, this post is getting long enough but be looking for our 16 week appointment recap this week! It was an interesting one to say the least!
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