Let Freedom Ring

Although it's already the 7th, I can't not blog about how we spent our 4th of July because it was definitely one to remember.

Denim Bow Skirt//Apartment Eighteen

Since last year we spent the morning of the 4th on the beach, I decided to make that our little tradition. So that morning we headed out to Folly Beach. It was the perfect morning at the beach. We have finally found our "spot" on the beach and just always go to that same spot. We stayed out for 3 hours and then came home to change and get ready for our little BBQ get together with some of our friends.

I wish we would have gotten a picture of all of us together, especially since we were all in patriotic colors. The conversations are always so great with that group of friends!  I always end up laughing so hard my stomach hurts.

After the BBQ we headed to River Front Park, on the old navy base in North Charleston. They have quite the set up there. Complete with an entertainment stage, splash pad, inflatables for kiddos, and my favorite...food trucks! We met up with some of our closest friends that we've made here in Charleston.

The weather was beautiful up until about an hour before the fireworks were scheduled to start. They made an announcement saying we all had to evacuate the park and find shelter. UHHHH WHAT?!?!?! I was mildly freaking out. So we headed to our friends car and piled in the back seat with their 4 kids to wait out the wind and rain storm. Finally they said everyone could go back into the park and luckily a lot of people left because of the storm so we still got a good spot. We finished the night off by watching incredible fireworks in the rain, under our umbrella with our cute friends. It was a 4th of July to remember.

Bridal Shower

We just got back from a fun weekend back in Georgia. The whole reason we went was so that I could host a bridal shower for my cute cousin, Shae, who is getting married in 13 days.

Out of all my cousins I am closest to Shae. I am so glad the Stevens moved to Georgia so that we could grow up together and I could be there to watch her love story unfold with Seth. Like every relationship, there were ups and downs, but that's what makes it beautiful. I couldn't be more excited to see the two of them finally tie the knot in 13 days. You can totally tell that Seth adores Shae and that's all that I could want for her because of course I think she deserves the best.

Anyways, back to the shower. Shae's wedding them is shabby chic with blush and navy as her wedding colors. I had such a fun time creating the invites, coming up with games to play, and the food to eat (the best part if we are being honest, haha).

I'm so thankful for all the help I had to make this shower so sweet for Shae. My mom helped me with the decorations and putting fruit kabobs together. My Aunt Sherry (Shae's mom) was so amazing to let us hold the shower at her house and took charge with the majority of the food. And Colby was the perfect photographer for the event and chipped in and helped with food too!

 I love putting on parties and this was the best one because it was for my Shae Audrey! :)

change

This past week I've had 2 people tell me that I've "changed" a lot since we moved here a little over a year ago. Usually that phrase has a negative connotation attached to it, but honestly it couldn't be more of a compliment. I knew that was what the people who told me that I had changed meant too. 

Six weeks ago I added a picture on instagram where I got real honest. This past year in Charleston has been full of struggles for me. Full of moments where the phrase "comparison is the thief of joy" couldn't have been more true. I struggled with my self confidence when I felt as all the girls around me were model material and I was just your plain Jane. I struggled figuring out where I fit in within our new ward and making and keeping friends. I struggled with watching my friends go on incredible once in a life time trips while Brad and I took on thousands of dollars in student loans and was working every single day.

I was bitter and in a really hard place in my life. I tried to hide it because that's what we as humans do. We don't want anyone thinking that we are struggling because that might put off the impression that we are weak, and who wants to be weak.

From about August 2014 to February 2015 I worked on myself A LOT. There was a lot of praying and crying going on during those 6 months. I had to get to the point where I could truly be happy. As bad as it sounds I had to stop caring about how other people acted and what they did. It took a long time for me to get there. One day it just clicked that I am the one who is in charge of my happiness. I had to stop comparing for my sanity. I couldn't let things that I couldn't control take over my happiness.

I'm so proud to be have been able to look at those people this week and say "thank you". I think rather then the word "changed" the more accurate phrase would be "you've grown a lot" because that is exactly what I have done. As hard as it was going through that dark time in my life, I'm so grateful for it because I've learned so much.

"You don't find a happy life, you make it" and that's exactly what I plan on doing. I know I will hit bumps a long the road but I'm striving to create the happiest life for Brad and I, and one day our little family.

with a very special love

Today the children in our primary got up and sang a song they have been learning for Father's Day. It goes like this:

The father of our home leads our family
With wisdom's light in all that's right;
My father's good to me.

Fathers are so special with a very special love.
They watch us and protect us.
They guide us and direct us
Back to our home above.

I love this so much. I often find that I can't make it through a song about moms and dads without it pulling at my heart strings and I end up balling my eyes out. Growing up has really made me treasure the relationships that I have with each of my parents, but today I'm going to highlight my dad. 

 My dad holds such a special place in heart. There have been times where I have wondered if he ever felt like I didn't care as much about him because of the amazing relationship I have with my mom. I really hope he didn't because that is not the case at all and it would break my heart. I love him deeply. There is one letter (my love language remember)in particular that my dad wrote to me while I was at girls camp one year that I will treasure forever and think about often. The words he expressed illustrated so beautifully the special love that he has for me. 

I'm so thankful to my dad for being the perfect dad to us girls. I'm sure it's every man's dream to have a son that he can play sports with, go fishing, and do other boy activities, but I never felt like my dad wished one of us was a boy. He loves us for who we are, the good and the bad. I remember all the times he would just sit on the couch and let us play beauty shop as we put bows in his hair and did his toe nails. He is the definition of a MAN. 

Thank you dad for always calling me Brettly. It never fails to put a smile on my face. Thank you for all the personal conversations we had on our way to and from Valdosta and the airports. They are times I will always hold dear to my heart. Thank you for always "guiding and directing me back to my home above", by example of your faithfulness and dedication to the church. I love you Faddah and hope you've had a wonderful father's day.

home is where your mom is

This will always be one of my favorite pictures of my mom and I, mostly because I think it really shows how much I think of my mom. I admire and adore her so much. Mother's Day is one of my favorite days because on social media everyone posts about their moms and it always reminds me how thankful I am for mine (and how I wish we had more pictures together).

This past year as a nanny I have gotten a little glimpse as to what the role of "mom" entails. I'm so thankful for a mom who really embraced (and still does) her calling as a mother. I don't remember her ever yelling at me (although I'm sure I thought she was yelling a few times), I don't remember her ever complaining about having to make dinner every night, or take care of sick kids, and keeping up with housework. She still makes sure we are all safe and well taken care of and worries about us girls when things are going just quite right. How wonderful it is to be so loved and cherished. I know she would do anything for any of us.

She is everything I hope to be in a mother. As much as I say I would be happy to have all boys, I want at least one girl so that I can have the same bond with my daughter as I have with my mom. There is nothing like our relationship and saying she is my very best friend doesn't even scratch the surface.

Thanks mom for being there for me through the thick and thin. For always being my biggest fan. My world is a better place because you're in it! I love you!

the smallest things take up the most room in your heart

Tonight I lost it on Brad. Now before you go thinking I'm a CrAzY wife let me explain. It may just be because I'm super emotional but I figured I might as well blog about it on a day where I'm feeling super sentimental about my job.

My dad always said do something you love and you'll never work a day of your life. I can honestly say I love what I do. This specific job has stretched and challenged me in so many ways but my heart has never been more full.

They always say you never really know love until you become a parent, and you guys I can't even comprehend that kind of love. My mind is blown just trying to think about it. I love my parents, sisters, and husband more than I could ever imagine and little Ella has opened my eyes to a new kind of love and she's not even mine.

This past month she has done so much growing up, and it's really bittersweet. I came home and just cried thinking back on all that her and I have been through. I started watching Ella when she was little over a month old. I remember those newborn days that were spent just snuggling. I honestly held her all day long, I couldn't get enough of her little sleepy smiles. I also remember how bad her acid reflux was and how there were some days where I would just cry because I knew she was in so much pain and I just wanted to take it all away. I remember when her pediatrician kept telling her parents she would never crawl, I worked on it with her every day just to prove him wrong, and then one day it just clicked and she was a crawling machine. Now she is 9 months old, she's standing on her own, knows how to get up the stairs, and is walking with assistance and my heart doesn't know whether to be so happy that she is thriving or sad that she is growing up way too fast.

It breaks my heart to think that one day, I'm going to have to say good-bye to someone who has become such a huge part of my life, and I think that is why I lost it. Ella is more than just a "job" to me. I sit back and think of the immense love that hopefully one day I'll get to experience with my own children. It's an overwhelming feeling to even think about, it makes my heart feel so full, that one day I will know the kind of love that parents have for their children and I hope that I never take one day for granted, because just with this little glimpse into motherhood I know it goes all too fast. Luckily I'll get to keep them for eternity! ;)

I'm so thankful to be a woman, to have the divine calling to be a mother one day. I truly know that it is the most important thing I will do while on this Earth. I feel so blessed to have a mother who loves me every single day of my life. She is the perfect example of what I wish to be to my children, an incredible mother and best friend.

I know it won't be easy but I'm 110% positive that it will be so so worth it. 

March Madness

No, I'm not talking about basketball. I'm talking about how crazy the month of March was for Brad and I. It's hard to believe there are only two more days of this month, where did it all go?!

We have been out of town every single weekend and it's exhausting. I'm so grateful that we are done with our traveling for awhile and that if I want to just stay home and rest I can on the weekends. It's been non-stop and I don't know how people do it, especially when they work full time.

The weekend of the 14th we went back to Georgia for Brad's brother, Drew's wedding. We are glad that Drew and Bailey have finally sealed the deal.

The next weekend I flew back to see some of my college friends tie the knot! I actually introduced them and encouraged D to go for Ann so it was so fun to see them 4 years later becoming Mr. and Mrs. Added bonus was that I got to see a lot of my other college friends too! 

This past weekend was the Hinman Dental Conference in Atlanta. I went to nanny my sweet little Ella and Brad attended some of the classes. Out of all of our trips this month, this one was probably one of my favorites. I made extra money and all of our expenses were paid for but that wasn't even the best part! The best part was that it gave me a little glimpse of what it will be like when Brad and I are toting around a little baby of our own. I'm telling y'all, you think you love a man...well add a baby, and the love grows for that man like a million times more.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Easter weekend! We are super excited for General Conference, it's one of my most favorite weekends of the year!